no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
