I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
