Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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