she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Drunk is not a location!
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
