Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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