The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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