I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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