in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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