Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
