We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
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