I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
