I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
