He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
