can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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