I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
