if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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