I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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