just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
