You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize