this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
