My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize