at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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