I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
