i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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