Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
