i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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