Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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