in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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