they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
