somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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