so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
