margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
God, I missed his penis.
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