i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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