So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize