I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
