i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
