so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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