it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
