Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
