I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize