SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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