can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
