She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
