I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He? As in you personified your dick?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
