Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Randomize
