it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize
