why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
