i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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