so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
it hurts more in the daytime
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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