You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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