So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
